Cold Hard Ground
by BadWolfReborn
Summary: If that Dalek had flown a few inches to the left, they both would have been safe (and together). But what, exactly, would happen if it had hit the Doctor's lever instead? AU Doomsday, series 3 & 4 rewrite. 10/Rose, rating to be upped.
1. Prologue

**Cold hard ground**

**AU of Doomsday, series 3 & 4.**

**Not your average fix-it.**

**Prologue. **

Jack Harkness and Suzie Costello were thrown forward as the jeep screeched to a halt in front of Canary Wharf. The streets of London- no, of Britain- were near deserted, with only dead bodies and abandoned cars littering the roads, meaning that they had reached the capital in less than an hour, when normally it would take longer than that just to get out of Wales. A ghostly _(ha)_ aura haunted the country, as people celebrated their own survival and mourned their dead in equal measure behind closed doors, scared of stepping outside again in case the monsters came back.

"Come on, quickly," Jack instructed, the slam of his door once he was out of the car echoed by hers. "We need to make sure the equipment is destroyed before anyone else can use it."

They entered Torchwood One's lobby quickly, no security people or protocols left to stop them, and jogged up the stairs until they got to the thirteenth floor, quickly reaching the offices in charge of monitoring the Ghost Shift room.

"_Fine, but I want this on record. I, on behalf of Torchwood Three, think this whole thing is bloody stupid. You are going to get people killed, just so that you're ignorant ass-"_

_Sighing, Yvonne Hartman pressed a button on the underside of the desk and two security guards stomped in. _

"_Your concerns have been noted, Captain. Now, if you would please like to remove yourself from the building before my friends here do..." _

Throwing the door open, Jack froze, causing Suzie to bump into him. Ignoring her curses as she tried to balance the bags slung over her shoulder, he held up a hand to call for silence.

"What? What is it?" she hissed, finally regaining her balance.

"Someone's here."

"There are loads of people here, Jack," she said, not looking at the bodies thrown around the room even as she indicated towards them. "They're everywhere."

Jack shook his head but stayed silent, trying to focus on where the life he could feel was coming from. It found him before he could find it.

"Jack?" A small voice whispered, the cavernous walls bouncing the one word back and forth as he located the person sat on the opposite side of the room. It was a girl _(woman)_, crouched against the white wall- which was why he hadn't seen her straight away- looking at him with mascara running down her cheeks to show where her now dried tears had run.

"Rose?"

_The air rushing past their ears didn't block out the dying screams of the Daleks and Cybermen rushing past them into hell, nor did it cancel out the look of terror in Rose's eyes one of the final monsters to go by slammed into the lever on the Doctor's side, throwing it forward. _

_Too far forward. _

_Reaching for the lever, his jaw clenched as he realised that there was no way he could grab it enough in order to pull it back, which needed to happen soon. He could feel the air around them slowing, but there was still Daleks and Cybermen that needed to go into the void, otherwise they'd be back at stage one- the human forces were depleted, there was no way in high Gallifrey they could cope with even one Dalek . _

_Risking one last glance at Rose- still holding onto her clamp, but looking like she wanted to run to him- he smiled bravely. _

"_Hold on!" He shouted._

_And then he let go. _

"Jack!" Rose sobbed, leaning on the wall behind her to help her stand up. Forgetting about Suzie, about Torchwood, about the deaths and the terror, he ran towards her, wrapping her in a huge hug.

They stayed silent for a few moments until Jack pulled back, curiosity winning out over joy at seeing his best friend again for the first time in over a hundred years.

"Why are you here? Stupid question, don't answer that. Where's the Doctor?" He spoke quickly, unable to believe that out of all the people in the universe to be here, on this floor, in this room, it would be Rose who survived.

Actually he kinda could, and he was so glad she was.

When Rose didn't answer after a full minute his grip on her tightened and he asked again. Eventually she shook her head and stopped avoiding eye contact.

"Gone, Jack. He's stuck in another universe and I don't think there's any way back."

**So it's only a short chappy, but it's only a prologue so yeah.  
In other news, please vote for the D and Rose here: http(:/) .com(/) 2013(/)04(/)10(/)greatest-tv-couple-of-all-time-fi nal(/) **

**It's the final against Glee (again!) and every time we get ahead those little punks pull it back so every vote counts!**

**Review please! **

**Chloe xxx**


	2. Chapter 1

**Cold hard ground**

It had been six weeks since the Doctor had died.

Well, not _died_, he supposed, but stopped existing in any way that seemed important. He was here with Rose's family- her mum and her almost dad and her best friend- and she was in the normal, slower universe, with just the TARDIS for company.

Oh Rassilion, the only thing that competed for his attention other than Rose was his third heart. The one being that had accompanied him through everything- through Susan and Romana and the Rani, through Skaro and Earth and the jaws of the Nightmare Child- was going to be left to gather dust on a street corner on the edges of the Powell Estate, just like he'd instructed for a whole different type of disaster.

But at the end of it, the TARDIS was fully capable of selecting a new owner- able to see the timelines as she was (even more so than him) without being bogged down in any time or place, she could select someone who would look after her however she liked, someone who would be able to grasp the basics in order to get her around. He was much more worried about Rose.

Humans, he had eventually discovered after many centuries of trial by error, liked to have stability. Even travellers wanted a form of remembering who they were- a photo, a hairstyle, a friend. That's why regenerations shook them up so much- to see the alien you relied on for safety die and then reappear with a whole new face cut off a major link to their past- another piece of humanity down the drain, as if he didn't damage them enough. And now Rose was left on a planet she hardly knew anymore, with no-one she really knew.

A knock on the door caused the Doctor to look away from the ceiling, not quite meeting Jackie's eyes as she walked in.

"How are ya, darling? Do you need anything?"

"Nah, I'm fine," he lied, jumping off the bed he'd been lying in and bouncing over to the window, avoiding looking at her. "I'll be out of your hair in a few days, don't worry. Erm, I _say_ a few days, I mean whenever Pete can sort out the documents- it's really not necessary to get me those, you know, I could easily rustle up something with the stuff in my pockets. Eh, I could become one of your celebrity friends, Jacks, and then we could have little... celebrity parties! Wouldn't that be nice? Although, it's plausible that you'd end up shooting me for spilling something on your carpets and I'm talking too much again, aren't I?"

Nodding, Jackie looked around as she stepped into what they'd all dubbed "his" room. It had nothing personal in it except for a few identical spare outfits and a pair of skinny jeans for when Jackie insisted it was too warm out for his suits, even if he hadn't _technically_ left the mansion yet.

"You are not stealing money for the rest of your lives, mister. Rose has told me about that time you two were on that planet with the long name where you didn't pay for anything for two weeks. It's all very well and good running about..."

She continued on, missing the way the Doctor had pulled his ear and looked at his feet once she mentioned Rose. He knew she mourned her daughter- she used to moan if they didn't visit every one of her weeks, after all- but she was much better at dealing with it. She cried, she shouted, and then she moved on until the next time.

It was a dark day when the Doctor admired Jackie Tyler for something as domestic as dealing with grief.

_(Not grief Rose wasn't dead she couldn't possibly be dead he'd know he'd feel it in both his hearts)_

He snapped himself back to attention as she smacked him over the head, sick of him ignoring her.

"Did you even hear what I just said?"

"...Something about that time I visited Michaelexophia and didn't pay for anything?"

She tutted as she straightened his tie- brown with blue swirls, the one he'd been wearing as he came here, and the only one he'd worn since- and attempted to flatten his hair.

"No, stupid, I was saying about how Pete wants you to go into Torchwood tomorrow. He says-"

"No."

"Listen, I know what you mean but-"

"There is no way I will ever, _ever_, step into that place Jackie. Ever. I've lost everything thanks to that place- we lost _Rose_."

"It's different to the one back home, Doctor, I promise. Their trying to help you, alien skinny boy, but Pete needs to show you something first."

"Can't he just ask me here?" Stepping out of her reach as she shook her head, he tugged his tie back into position and ran a hand through his hair subconsciously, earning a glare for his troubles. "Fine. I will go there once and then I will leave, and believe me- I'm only going this time because it's Pete who's asking."

"Rose!" Jack yelled as he strolled through the hub and noticed it was empty. "Where are you?"

A blonde head popped out of the door from the office where they held their meetings, waving towards him.

"'M up here with Tosh, Jack. She thinks she's done it!"

He froze at the bottom of the steps that led up to the upper floored room, almost dropping the pizza boxes that he carried. Balancing them, he leaped up the stairs two by two, not even panting once he reached her.

"How?"

"Something about the configuration of individual waves and rays or something, and how only a few can infiltrate the vortex- I don't know, she tried to explain it but... you know."

Rose trailed off as she walked back into the office, him following close behind and shutting the door behind him. The television screens that lined the walls were all turned on, displaying different languages. Unable to read them all, Jack focused on the one's he could- English, Welsh and Gaelic. Whilst the English was monitoring some sort of countdown, the other two showed a table depicting the balance of gamma, radio and micro waves.

"You know, I probably should be telling you to go home seeing as your shift finished an hour ago, but I'm guessing that this was all your idea."

Tosh looked up from the computer as he placed the pizza on the monochrome glass table, an unapologetic expression on her face.

"Yeah, but I knew what was wrong with it and there was no way in high heaven that I'd be able to do anything else until I'd sorted this. Do you want me to explain it to you or-"

"No no no no no," Jack cut her off, holding up a hand. "Leave it; just tell me what you're doing now."

"Right, well, the thing is, the way the message was formatted meant that it couldn't break through the ri- _vortex_. I've just finished transforming it to a higher wave, so the signal will be clearer. However, it means that we have to record the video now because the strength of the waves would cause more damage. Also, we don't know whether that universes time stream is running along the same speed as ours. It's been two weeks for us already, and we started broadcasting eleven days ago."

"I'm pretty sure they are ahead of us," Rose murmured, leaning towards the computer Tosh was working on. "Not by loads, but enough to make a difference."

"You'll only have a few minutes max, otherwise the waves will be distorted and no amount of clearance will make it viewable."

"But they already have some of the other messages, right?" Jack asked around a mouthful of food.

Tosh nodded.

"Right then, Rose, you ready?"

_*-...*-*_

"Sir, we've gotten another message!"

Pete looked up from the small mountain of paperwork that lay on his desk (_oh, the perils of being the director of two worldwide co-operations_) at the receptionist-Dawid, Gavin? Something Welsh, anyway- who had come running into his office, glad at the opportunity to not have to do them today.

"Already? We only got one this morning. We're not scheduled another until tomorrow."

"We know, sir, but we think something's changed over on that side."

"Changed? What do you mean?" He asked, panicked.

_The Cybermen are back help us please we can't hold them we need the Doctor please Pete help us we have found Rose we have found her body London has fallen_

"Nothing bad, sir, but they must have figured out how to get them through clearer- we can actually read these ones."

"Is the Doctor on the way?"

"Yes, sir, Jackie just rang five minutes ago- I was coming to tell you when I was alerted of the incoming arrival."

Standing up, Pete motioned for the young man- Ianto, that was it. Nice lad, bit keen- to go on into the main building. Following him, Pete pondered the recent set of events that had led to him asking the Doctor to come to Torchwood.

He himself had brought the Doctor into this universe- Jackie had worried about Rose, so he'd decided to check on her. Upon arriving in the other universe, he'd found himself being dragged towards the void, just as the Doctor crashed into him. He'd had no other choice but to return to his own world straight away- Jackie (no matter which one, he'd discovered quickly) would bring him back to life, castrate him, and then kill him again.

_A bright light filled the room, before Pete and the Doctor crashed to the floor. Jackie and Mickey watched in silence as the alien stood shakily, before rushing at the blank wall at the opposite side of the room, smashing his hands on it as he could walk back home if only it wasn't for this one _stupid_ wall. _

"_Take me back! No, take me- take me back! Rose!" _

_As Mickey went to help him up, Pete pulled off his hopper and slid it along the floor. Picking it up and pressing it forcefully, the Doctor refused to look at anyone. After several seconds of not being transported across a now closed rift, the frantic energy filtered out of him slowly. _

"_It's stopped working," he whispered, falling back against the wall, unconsciously echoing the position Rose had undertaken on the other side of the cosmos. "I did it. I closed the breach." _

_Silence, and then he screamed, full of pain and anger and fear, and threw the hopper to the other side of the room. It smashed into a hundred tiny pieces, and Jackie walked over to him, trying to lift him into a standing position. _

"_Come on, sweetheart. Stand up, please." _

_The Doctor shook his head, ignorant of Jackie's pleas as he stayed slumped against the wall, face blank and voice numb as he curled up on himself. _

"_I've left her. She promised me, she said she'd stay. I've left her." _

Arriving in the main laboratory, Pete walked over to one of the newer technicians who moved to the side so that he could see the message that was written in large, simple letters on the screen. He turned to Ianto slowly, a forced calm demeanour upon him.

"Get the Doctor."


	3. Chapter 2

**Cold hard ground**

The Doctor strode into Torchwood- looking for the lives of him that he wished to be anywhere but where he was- flanked by Ianto, who was struggling to keep up with his long strides and talk at the same time.

"Yes, so if you could please make your way upstairs, Sir? Mr Tyler is waiting in the upstairs laboratory. There's a transmission that he wants you could see."

"What kind of transmission?" The Doctor asked warily, eyeing the young man beside him as if he could catch a disease from him. It was unnerving, yes, but the Welshman had dealt with worse during his short time working in London. "Is this why Pete asked me to come in?"

"Yes, sir," Ianto nodded, leading the taller man into the lifts. "If you could come this way, unless you want to walk up twenty-six flights of stairs."

"Ay, we've walked further."

Ianto's brow furrowed slightly as he tried to figure out what the Doctor- Doctor _who_, precisely? - had meant by "we". Ignoring it for the time being, he held on to one of the silver bars that wrapped around the interior of the lifts as they ascended, looking attentive. The Doctor wondered how it felt to have an office job like he did- at Torchwood, maybe, but essentially it was the same as any other. A boss, a pay check every month, and rules and regulations.

Whilst Jackie had tried to convince him yesterday that she wouldn't make him work at a bank or anything, it still felt stifling to walk into a place like this, with its seating-regulated floor spaces and cheap glass mirrors lining every second wall.

Even worse that it was Torchwood. Luckily, this universe's was set out very differently to his own- stopping him seeing the phantom of someone who wasn't there once the lift doors opened and him and Ianto stepped out into what looked like something out of CSI.

Spotting Pete through one of the glass walls, The Doctor frowned at the sight. He was surrounded by five people in long coats, one of whom was fiddling with a bunch of sparking wires. As he and Ianto approached, Pete's voice became clearer.

"- magnify the waves then! It can't be that hard!"

"It's not that simple, Mr Tyler. The waves are distorted, and we can't preserve them, so-"

"Dammit!" Spinning around, Pete spotted the two newcomers. He nudged the Chinese-looking woman next to him out of the way slightly and motioned for the Doctor to stand next to him. "Doctor, quick, get over here."

He shuffled through past the scientists who all stood gazing towards the oldest human in the room. The Doctor's attention, however, was focused mainly on the screen.

All humans associated blue and silver surfaces with futuristic technology, in some way. To the Doctor, of course, it seemed practically prehistoric, but he'd always liked the way that they deluded themselves into thinking that colours dictated progress. The screen in front of him was silver-edged, with a pale blue light shining from it in the cold fluorescent lights hanging above. Letters were appearing slowly, adding to the short message that it already read.

_TORCHWOOD. _

_PLEASE ALERT PETE TYLER AND THE DOCTOR TO THE INCOMING MESSAGES. PLEASE ALERT PETE TYLER AND THE DOCTOR. MESSAGE FROM- _

"Who is sending this?" He asked. Normally, it took him to actually cause some damage to whatever planet he was on before anyone came looking for him. And why did they want Pete?

"It's from another universe," the human began. "Your universe, to be specific."

Knuckles gripping the edge of the table until Pete could see the knuckles underneath his human-like skin ripple and tense, the Doctor's face darkened, and his face turned away from the screen to glare at the man who'd let him in when he'd had nowhere else to go.

"That's impossible, and you know it."

"We've been getting them since just after you arrived. They were always very faint," Pete carried on, pretending to not have heard him speak. "Tosh here thinks that although the main passage to this universe closed immediately, the rest are taking a little longer. Whoever sends these must have figured a way to make the transmissions clearer."

"Sir, we have a new message." Tosh said, but the Doctor was already walking away.

There were plenty of universes, plenty of potential gaps which still needed to be closed, plenty of people who could have sent the messages in the first place. Bringing him here was stupid beyond all comprehension. He could hear one of the males talking- something about a video- but he was too angry to care right at that moment.

"Doctor?"

_Oh._

He spun around quickly, eyes lighting up. "Rose... where are you?"

Reaching out to stroke the computer screen, he finally gave in to the falling sensation his hearts had been feeling ever since he heard the words _your universe_. Trust his Rose to manage what he couldn't.

"I'm in Cardiff with Jack," Rose said, and for second- one shining, glorious second- he thought she could hear him, before she continued talking and he realised that it really was just _(not just never just) _a recorded message, one that meant he could never reply. "His friend Tosh helped me get this message through one of the last closing gaps. She's spent the last two weeks solidly trying to find a way for me to send this- she's almost burnt herself up so I could say goodbye."

Her voice broke as she gave a small laugh, and The Doctor was so focused on her that he didn't notice the strangers leaving the room at Pete's frantic hand waving. Only the three of them- Pete, Rose, and the Doctor- remained as she began to speak again. The Doctor stroked the screen gently, looking up only when the ghostly echo to the message vanished, leaving it static free. Seeing Pete near the volume controls, he looked down again as she continued talking.

"Its proberly obvious to you, super brain, but Tosh warned me to tell you that there's nothing you can do to make this video last, and there's no way for me to get through to you. We've been prodding at the rift, but no luck. I'm just an image- no touch."

He'd already known that, in the way his stomach twisted even as he dreamed of their reunion on the few occasions that he had slept since arriving here. His entire being screamed out at the chance of fracturing the walls, making the whole thing collapsed, fighting against everything he wanted.

"If I could I'd ask where you are, but I think I've worked it out- you'll either be with mum or with Pete at Torchwood, like I am. Whatever it is, it could be worse- a few months before I met you, mum dragged me to Norway, would you believe it, some place called Darlig Ulv Straden for a funeral. I checked it out when I got back, it meant Bad Wolf bay... It's like I was telling myself to hold on, innit. I'm babbling on now," she choked back a sob, rubbing at her face as she glanced at whoever was on the other side of her screen. "It's just, we've got two minutes, and I don't even know if you're _there_. I can't think of what to say!"

"Anyway, there are six of us here. Me, Jack- our Jack, I'd explain but I don't have the time- Tosh, and three others. I'm helping out for a bit- I'm going to start helping them monitor the Rift, keep things safe down here for a bit. But yeah, defending the Earth just like usual." She laughed, before turning serious again.

"You've been announced dead here. UNIT came looking, they tracked my bio-signature or something and told me that you used to work for them, had the files and everything. Jack told them- Canary Wharf, about the Daleks and Cybermen and stuff, and then next thing you know, you've got a special plaque at the memorial centre. But we know better, right? You're off with my mum and Mickey, having a whole new adventure. Its ok, you'll only have to wait a few centuries until we discover time travel according to Jack, and then you can be off again. Have some adventures for me, eh?"

Tears began to run down her face furiously, as she gripped the table she stood on front of.

"I'm never going to see you again, am I? I've got photos and stuff, though, the TARDIS keeps throwing them at me, which is more than what you have, I suppose. Oh God, listen to me moaning at you," she sniffed, "when I'm not the one- whatever you do, don't be by yourself. I've got the TARDIS, you stick with mum, find someone else, just don't be alone. I lo-" she broke off, wiping her face again as she struggled to speak coherently against the cascade of tears running down her cheeks.

"Doctor- and this is quite right too, because it could never have been anyone else, not really, not when you think about it. I lo-"

And then, in the space of time it would take someone to blink, the message broke off, and the Doctor was left stood there as his world collapsed around him for the final time.

In a different Torchwood building in a different universe, Rose stilled as the screen in front of her turned blank. Two faces turned to look sympathetically at her, and Jack wrapped her in a warm hug that didn't defrost the icy chill that had settled in her bones.

**So, I had to change the goodbye a little, what with it being Rose talking and it being one-way only (I'm mean, aren't I?) but what did you think? **

**Please review!  
Chloe xxx**


	4. Chapter 3

**Cold Hard Ground**

**There's a little bit of strong language in this one, but nothing too much. Also, the second half of the chapter has a trigger warning for mental health. It's nothing too strong, but just in case. **

_One month after saying goodbye to the Doctor. _

It had been busy at Torchwood recently. Rift activity had rocketed since early November, and the amount of Weevils roaming the streets was just below average, leading the team to believe something big was coming- something really, _really_ big. The team itself had changed, too, two new faces and an old friend buried six feet under. Everyone apart from Jack had been left confused by the first girl, having seen nor heard of her before. Working with the apparent-immortal, that shouldn't have been considered strange, but the look in her eyes told them all that she had seen far too much for someone her age.

Her name was Rose- Rose Tyler-and she had been miserable when she first came two months ago; never leaving the room she'd been given by Jack at the opposite side of the compound. With only a few bags of belongings and a blue box in tow (literally, Jack had ordered in a truck to bring it from London according to Ianto), suspicion had been high.

Then Jack told them why she was here, and they all knew how it felt to lose the person closest to them. Apart from Suzie, of course, but Suzie was a psycho who didn't really care about anyone other than herself, as they all discovered three days ago (but that's a story for later).

Tosh had been assigned to working with Rose at first, and the two of them spent each and every day for two weeks in the office, only emerging when Ianto brought in that days chosen takeaway.

(_Owen, you've met Rose. Rose, this is Owen. _Owen_ is a prat who keeps ordering food under the name Torchwood, which as you proberly know, is a secret bloody organisation!_)

(Owen was also the one to start cracking jokes about what Tosh and Rose were doing in the office, earning him a smack over the head from Jack when he forgot that the older man was behind him.)

Until suddenly, they weren't in the office anymore, at all. Tosh was back at her desk, relieving Ianto from proberly the only job he couldn't actually do impeccably, and Rose was the newest field member. Owen earned another smack over the head when he stared joking about how she only got the job thanks to her "close relationship with the boss."

(Sometimes, he thought, Jack had been born in a century were humour was less desirable than the bubonic plague.)

The fuss around Rose died down once Gwen Cooper arrived (thankfully, according to Rose).

Having discovered Torchwood after witnessing a wild weevil bite off a man's head, it was inevitable that Jack would take some kind of action in order to block her memories. The retcon, however, was like a bitter pill. It would leave an aftertaste in a way, a faint itch at the back of your mind that some people could ignore and some people couldn't. Gwen, it seemed, was one of those who couldn't.

Especially when encountering Suzie Costello pointing a gun at her head in the middle of the bay, before the lunatic committed suicide.

Of course Gwen would then start working for them. Once she'd found out the constant threat Cardiff was in, how could she not?

So now it was December the twenty fourth. Tosh, Owen, Gwen and Ianto had all gone home- Gwen to Rhys, Owen to his latest conquest, and Ianto & Tosh to empty flats and microwave meals for one- leaving Rose and Jack alone in the Hub with their Christmas dinner and a flying dinosaur.

The Hub was where all official (and lots of unofficial) Torchwood business went on. Several miles deep and almost as old as the institute itself, the area had been kept secret for over a century. Through alien-origin earthquakes and terrible weather-origin floods, the hub had remained, being buried under rubble only to be modernised by the next generation of Torchwood 3 employees.

No-one even knew why they were still called Torchwood 3, being the only remaining members of the institute.

Torchwood 1 had been based at Canary Wharf, run by Yvonne Hartman. That had been decommissioned after the deaths it had caused (deaths which Rose felt guilty for- Torchwood, she'd discovered, wouldn't even be in existence if it wasn't for her and the Doctor's little meeting with Queen Victoria).

Torchwood 2 was somewhere in Northern England, but it had been lost- same with Torchwood 4 in Edinburgh. Rose had asked how you could "lose" an institution, never mind two, but Jack had shook his head, and told her that she was "better off not knowing".

Torchwood 5 in India had been shut down Jack himself a while ago due to "problems with the government". Again, Rose had wondered about the specifics- after all, Jack didn't look much older than he had when he'd been travelling with them, five years at the absolute _most_- but looking at him, she decided to wait to ask until another day, an easier conversation than the history of something they both resented.

"So, basically," Jack snorted around his mouthful of Tesco-bought turkey. "Torchwood used to span the entire British Empire, but thanks to its own stupidity, there are now six of us and a dinosaur called Myfawny."

"Does Owen not like me?" Rose asked, three servings and a Queen's speech later, as she and Jack sat on his bed in his room. (One of the main problems with the hub, they'd found when trying to find somewhere to eat their dinner, was a lack of recreational seating facilities.)

Shaking his head, Jack looked towards her curiously, before continuing to switch channels on his TV using his remote.

"He does too like you- why do you ask?"

"Just- he's a bit... weird towards me. Not all of the time, but it's a little creepy."

Jack sighed, throwing an arm around and pulling her closer as they settled in to watch Wallace and Gromit.

"Owen is a dick, I know that- we all know that- but he means well. His fiancée died just over as year ago- she was being operated on by Doctor's for a brain tumour, when really it was an alien parasite feasting on her brain. It messed him up for a while, but he got better once he came here. Helping people helped him- maybe not with his charming social skills- but he doesn't feel as bad as he used to. What with him being a Doctor, he blamed himself, thought he should have been able to save her."

"But that's stupid. There's no way he could have known."

"But that's what people are like, Rosie, always blaming themselves for things that aren't their fault."

"Sometimes it is their fault, though, isn't it." She whispered, thinking of how her wager with the Doctor ended up separating them, and costing her everyone she'd grown up with. If they hadn't been so cheeky, laughing whilst the Queen was terrified, then...

"Stop it," Jack said, tapping her on the nose. "It wasn't your fault, nor the Doctor's. Things happen, and sometimes there's nothing you can do to stop it. He told you about fixed points, right?"

"Yeah," she shut her eyes (be careful what you wish for don't touch the baby tell me you're sorry go to him) and ignored the single tear that worked its way out of her, trailing down her cheek before splashing onto the denim of her jeans.

"Hey don't cry, darling. Come here."

Jack pulled her into a full-on hug, shifting her like a child so that her head rested on his shoulders. She would have felt uncomfortable with anyone else, but this was Jack- ok, she might have only travelled with him for a few weeks, but those weeks with him and her first Doctor had been some of the best she'd ever had. Even when her head had been removed from the rest of her body whilst Jack looked after a caveman, she'd known she was safe and loved.*

Once she was settled down, Rose wiped her face roughly, sick of crying. Instead, she glanced at Jack, wondering what had happened to him since the Game station. He saw the question in her eyes, and laughed a little bitterly.

"Not today, Rose. Another day, maybe."

Rose was about to ask why _(he doesn't trust me anymore he doesn't know me he doesn't care)_ when a loud voice interrupted them, causing them to spin around at the ginger in a wedding dress that stood gaping at them.

_Pete's World, two years after goodbye_

It was a Tuesday.

The Doctor knew this not because of any counter or device or reminder, but because he was a Time Lord- the one thing he was sure of at this moment in time. Everything else was in flux, everything would always be in flux, because that is the type of life he lived now. No stopping, not ever, and definitely no more companions.

Actually, make it that he knew two things- he was a Time Lord, and everyone he cared for was taken away and put where he could never see them.

Two years ago he'd decided to never put anyone he met in danger again, by keeping contact minimum- hello, how are you, that's nice, farewell. It was the only way to keep this planet safe and even then, there was always the trouble of one of the few he ever interacted with being hunted for even that, which was why he would never talk to someone unless they initiated it.

He hated being so clinical about his life, but it was the only way to survive without going mad.

Hacking through the vines that threatened to wrap around him, the Doctor edged slowly through the rain forest he was exploring. That was the only positive aspect of being stuck _here (never going home never seeing the TARDIS never finding Rose)_ for the rest of his lives- everything was so different. Whilst the cities were much more modernistic, the wilder sections of the planet were just that- wilder. Focusing on their own little communities the humans had, for the most part, left the uninhabitable parts of the planet alone, only taking what they thought they needed.

He was the only creature in a good few miles, the Doctor decided, after trekking for several days until reaching where he was now. He'd started his journey near one of the tribes closer to the Amazon, before trekking south, losing himself in amongst the depths of Brazil. It was as good as he could get, stuck on this one tiny planet for a good three centuries or so. He could manage that. He'd likely regenerate a few times out of sheer boredom, but that was fine- he'd regenerated in more humiliating ways, surely. And he had a plan too, for getting back home.

Once the three thousand years he needed to wait until the Time Agency were up and running across the universe were up, he'd sneak into the base- he didn't know how yet, but he had three millennia to work it out- and take a vortex manipulator. He'd go back until he reached a time when the walls between universes were weak and hop into that universe along with one of Torchwood's teams, maybe even to the day at Canary Wharf.

The Doctor would do anything to stop Rose being by herself like he was, even if it meant waiting 3000 years or-

Anyway.

Until then, he'd stay here. Earth would do for a little while, and it wasn't _that_ long until humans mastered space travel. Stealing a ship of some sort wouldn't be too hard, and he could fix up one of the more basic ones until it fit his needs. Risking time travel in it would be too risky- not even his TARDIS could get him to the right place half the time- but it would pass the time until his plan could really be put into action.

Right now, however, he needed something to eat.

His pinstriped suit was torn to shreds, so he pulled the jacket, tie and shirt he'd been wearing off- his coat had been left back in the TARDIS, and he'd finally run out of identical suits- just leaving his layered T-shirt and trousers on.

_It doesn't matter;_ he tried to convince himself as he threw the ruined clothes away. _They don't matter. _

_(If he changes, how will she recognise him? _

_Will she want to recognise him? _

_She didn't know him when she saw him change, how will she believe me, what if I never find her ever again stop it stop stop stop it) _

Looking around the forest floor, he immediately spotted some berries that looked safe to eat. He licked one of them slightly, sure that if there was any poison in them, then his superior biology would fix it right away. And if it didn't, never mind. It wasn't like he'd know he was dead, and there was no one around to miss him.

Once he'd decided that the fruit was safe, he couldn't tell if the pang in his stomach was hunger or disappointment.

Something was going on- something was always going on somewhere in the world, of course, but the last few weeks in the forest had been the most peaceful he'd had for over a thousand years, easily.

Lights shone through the canopy above his head. The Doctor ducked through the leaves, avoiding being caught in the spotlight.

He thought they were looking for him.

It was Tuesday, again.

The Doctor hated Tuesdays. To be fair, he also hated Monday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday and Sunday. Saturdays were ok, he supposed, if a bit dull.

Several Tuesdays later, he couldn't see the point anymore.

After building a little hut in one of the natural clearings in the midst of the jungle, he didn't seem to be able to find the motivation to leave again. That meant standing still for a while, but it wasn't like there was anyone he could harm here anyway.

It also meant he hadn't changed clothes in over three months, but he couldn't bring himself to care that much. There was a river somewhere if it eventually got to be too much.

Five more Tuesdays.

And another.

And another.

Another.

The helicopters were back, yet again.

Closer this time, with a man's voice blasting over the speakers. Even his superior hearing couldn't make out distinct words over the chopping winds and screams of the smaller birds that got too close to the revolving blades that sliced through the air.

He thinks it might be Tuesday.

He wasn't sure, and that frightened him.

_(As much as it was possible to frighten someone who didn't really care whether he lived the night)._

He stopped looking for food a long time ago.

If he was sane right now (he wasn't), then he'd most likely have his glasses on, studying the gradual descent into madness the unshaven guy with no shirt was going through _(passed a long time ago),_ with a fool proof plan to help him.

He wasn't sane right now, though, so that didn't really matter, did it?

He was hearing voices.

He knew that because there was no way in high Gallifrey that someone would just stumble upon a dying Time Lord in the Amazon without planning to. There was no one who cared enough to plan on finding him; therefore, he must be imagining it.

He thinks he might be dying.

_What's really strange,_ the Time Lord who was once called the Doctor thought as he lay unconscious amongst the bushes of the Amazon rainforest, _is that the voice calling me sounds suspiciously like Jackie Tyler. _

**The tone for this one feels a little different to me- more like its one person speaking rather than several- but idk that's probs just me being stupid. Also, the two universe prospectives were originally going to be two different chapters, but I wanted to make them a little longer. Plus, I thought that the Doctor's meltdown fitted in better when paired with reading about Rose missed him, as it showed that they both were struggling in their own ways. **

***The Events I talked about involving cavemen and removed heads are canon (-ish). If you read the book Only Human with Nine, Jack and Rose, you'll know what I mean. **

**If you could please review, ta very much  
Chloe xxx**


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